Tuesday, April 18, 2006
How Did I Miss That?
Somehow this past Friday I missed the chance to toast my longest and perhaps best friend at his rehearsal dinner.
It started to sink in Saturday while I was standing beside his bride at the altar-of-love when I realized what a big mistake not toasting was.
The reality of the thing is that Winston and my relationship has changed a number of times over the years, so I'm not really emotional about the whole "will it be the same" question, but I should have a lot to say about where he's come from and where I see him going.
I'd like to apologize for not getting my head in the game on Friday and pulling this together, but I thought I'd give it a shot here on my blog.
Winston and I met at Prestonwood in HS although neither of us really remembers talking back then. It wasn't until we spent a weekend during our freshman year in College Station (which was weird because we both went to Baylor) that we became friends. I think we probably had 2 or 3 classes together that year, and realized that we were some of the only ones serious about learning anything.
I also realized that he had an enormous bulge in his pants that was irresistible!
We were great friends and roommates all through college, although I have to admit that living with Winston definitely prepared me better than any test I could have had for living with my wife later in life (insert another gay joke here).
Seriously though, I had never come across someone so absent minded in my entire life, and I'm pretty sure that I still haven't.
One time I remember that our air conditioner (which was in the ceiling in my bathroom) was leaking water whenever it was turned on. I explained this to Winston, and I even think I put a little sign on the refrigerator to remind him. Ya know something complicated like “Don’t turn on the AC,” but one day I came home to find about 5 inches of water on the bathroom floor - flowing over the trashcan that I'd left there to catch it in just such an occasion. When I confronted Winston about it, he said in typical Winston speak "You know I do stuff like that."
Well we got passed that oh so difficult moment, managing to remain friends.
Fast forward a bit and when Laura and I got married (2000), Winston agreed to be a groomsman at my wedding and to perform a song that still means a lot to me today whenever I hear it.
We separated a bit while I lived in France, but upon our return I was happy to put aside all my water dripping memories to move in with Winston once again. Laura and I were returning from the mission field and had no idea what we were going to do in Dallas, but were grateful to be able to count on Winston for a place to stay.
We lived there for a little over a year and Winston was a great friend to me during a time when neither L nor I really had much interest in "working" for new relationships. He encouraged me and helped me plug back into a career as well as some old and new friendships for which I am extremely grateful.
All around he's been the only man-friend with whom I've maintained a meaningful and deep relationship for longer than about 2 or 3 years, which leads me to Lindsay (and . . . I realize now I'm unsure how to spell your name).
Lindsey, I was really worried that no woman would ever choose to marry Winston. After, living with him twice I was sure that W would have a hard time convincing any woman to agree to cohabitate with his forgetful ass.
Heck, I'm just surprised he never burned his own house down, or got robbed by the workers who remodeled because he NEVER locked a door. I also have a strong suspicion that if I hadn't lived there, the trash would never EVER have been taken out when you first started dating.
Winston - you owe me for that one.
So Lindsay, I'm grateful to you. Because while you two have been together, I've seen a lot of Winston's insecurities and annoying little tendencies fade away under a thick coat of happiness. I've never seen him as confident as he is now, and there is a distinct sense I get from him that suddenly he is able to accomplish the things he wants out of life in a way he never has been able to before. I attribute that to you and the powerful love that you share together.
While I don't know you very well (Lindsey), seeing the two of you in love not only makes sense, but it makes you both better, and I think that is a testament to true love.
I offer my toast to your new commitment, that you would continue to love and improve each other for years to come.
J
It started to sink in Saturday while I was standing beside his bride at the altar-of-love when I realized what a big mistake not toasting was.
The reality of the thing is that Winston and my relationship has changed a number of times over the years, so I'm not really emotional about the whole "will it be the same" question, but I should have a lot to say about where he's come from and where I see him going.
I'd like to apologize for not getting my head in the game on Friday and pulling this together, but I thought I'd give it a shot here on my blog.
Winston and I met at Prestonwood in HS although neither of us really remembers talking back then. It wasn't until we spent a weekend during our freshman year in College Station (which was weird because we both went to Baylor) that we became friends. I think we probably had 2 or 3 classes together that year, and realized that we were some of the only ones serious about learning anything.
I also realized that he had an enormous bulge in his pants that was irresistible!
We were great friends and roommates all through college, although I have to admit that living with Winston definitely prepared me better than any test I could have had for living with my wife later in life (insert another gay joke here).
Seriously though, I had never come across someone so absent minded in my entire life, and I'm pretty sure that I still haven't.
One time I remember that our air conditioner (which was in the ceiling in my bathroom) was leaking water whenever it was turned on. I explained this to Winston, and I even think I put a little sign on the refrigerator to remind him. Ya know something complicated like “Don’t turn on the AC,” but one day I came home to find about 5 inches of water on the bathroom floor - flowing over the trashcan that I'd left there to catch it in just such an occasion. When I confronted Winston about it, he said in typical Winston speak "You know I do stuff like that."
Well we got passed that oh so difficult moment, managing to remain friends.
Fast forward a bit and when Laura and I got married (2000), Winston agreed to be a groomsman at my wedding and to perform a song that still means a lot to me today whenever I hear it.
We separated a bit while I lived in France, but upon our return I was happy to put aside all my water dripping memories to move in with Winston once again. Laura and I were returning from the mission field and had no idea what we were going to do in Dallas, but were grateful to be able to count on Winston for a place to stay.
We lived there for a little over a year and Winston was a great friend to me during a time when neither L nor I really had much interest in "working" for new relationships. He encouraged me and helped me plug back into a career as well as some old and new friendships for which I am extremely grateful.
All around he's been the only man-friend with whom I've maintained a meaningful and deep relationship for longer than about 2 or 3 years, which leads me to Lindsay (and . . . I realize now I'm unsure how to spell your name).
Lindsey, I was really worried that no woman would ever choose to marry Winston. After, living with him twice I was sure that W would have a hard time convincing any woman to agree to cohabitate with his forgetful ass.
Heck, I'm just surprised he never burned his own house down, or got robbed by the workers who remodeled because he NEVER locked a door. I also have a strong suspicion that if I hadn't lived there, the trash would never EVER have been taken out when you first started dating.
Winston - you owe me for that one.
So Lindsay, I'm grateful to you. Because while you two have been together, I've seen a lot of Winston's insecurities and annoying little tendencies fade away under a thick coat of happiness. I've never seen him as confident as he is now, and there is a distinct sense I get from him that suddenly he is able to accomplish the things he wants out of life in a way he never has been able to before. I attribute that to you and the powerful love that you share together.
While I don't know you very well (Lindsey), seeing the two of you in love not only makes sense, but it makes you both better, and I think that is a testament to true love.
I offer my toast to your new commitment, that you would continue to love and improve each other for years to come.
J
Friday, April 14, 2006
Me and Music
For a long time, I was really into discovering bands and listening to all kinds of music, new and old.
Now I find it exhausting. Seems like it was easier to pick out and find music that I liked in the by-gone era of less choice. Back in 1987 When I could go to "Mother's Records and Tapes" at Military Circle mall, I knew exactly what was cool.
I'm still very proud of my early purchases:
1. Lenny Kravitz - Let Love Rule
2. 10,000 Maniacs - In My Tribe
3. Peter Gabriel - So
I bypassed Poison and Erasure at the time for much more "alternative" choices before there even was an alternative genre.
This culminated in my being possibly the biggest - Junior High - R.E.M fan on the east coast. I had every R.E.M album before anyone ever even heard a little song about losing your faith. To this day R.E.M's "Dead Letter Office" is in my top 5 albums of all time.
Note that some might argue that this not really an album in the true sense but more of a compliation because it is really just a collection of B-sides and earlier songs. Depending on which version you get, the last five songs on DLO are actually from another early R.E.M album called "Chronic Town." C'Town is usually referred to as the first R.E.M album, and their inclusion in DLO makes it a great way to "discover" the early days of R.E.M if you aren't familiar with them already.
The Chronic Town songs were very influential on me. In fact I probably still compare all music I hear to those songs as a sort of ultimate example of "my kind of music." R.E.M has evolved, and I have to say that I am not as big a fan nowadays.
My music taste went from whiney white guys to angrier white guys with the "grunge" movement, and then somewhere about 1997; I just kind of dropped out. Now I struggle to find new music that I really feel is worth taking the time to experience. I just end up looking at buying old "Offspring" albums or some kind of iTunes R.E.M compilation where I can hear some of my old favorites. Even the new music that I do like usually sounds like something from 1995.
I think I'm posting this as a way to sort of mourn about the fact that this part of my life is basically over. I used to really relate to emotive lyrics and felt sincerely that music was a way to express myself when I couldn't find other words to do it.
Now the same old songs just bring up good or bad feelings from the old days which is good, but not the same.
Tuesday, April 11, 2006
The Cynical Tyrant said...
i'm quitting journey if it moves to saturday. i don't like to interrupt my weekend to go hang out with Jesus.i don't like 5pm sunday, either. that still cuts into my weekend.
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I said...
Where has Jesus been lately, he's so hard to get in touch with recently, and he never shows up at any of the places I go.
I mean I always have to make this big effort to show up someplace where I know he's gonna be. I thought he was God or something. Can't he be a bit more accomodating?
i'm quitting journey if it moves to saturday. i don't like to interrupt my weekend to go hang out with Jesus.i don't like 5pm sunday, either. that still cuts into my weekend.
=======================================
I said...
Where has Jesus been lately, he's so hard to get in touch with recently, and he never shows up at any of the places I go.
I mean I always have to make this big effort to show up someplace where I know he's gonna be. I thought he was God or something. Can't he be a bit more accomodating?
